


Him who reflects the moon

by CheckYourLie (svnwritten)



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: 2tae in this story happened in the past and that's it, 90s, Gangs, M/M, Motorbike Gang, Mutual Pining, Taeil is in the gang and his position is Milkshake Lover, Unsure Characters, a little bit of making out, author's knowledge about 90s is based on the fact that author was born in the 90s, hyuckil tag deserves better, inspired by KickIt teaser, it's mostly fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-02-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:21:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22809301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/svnwritten/pseuds/CheckYourLie
Summary: Taeil’s life was pretty ordinary safe for the fact that he was a part of a motorbike gang.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Moon Taeil, Lee Taeyong/Moon Taeil
Comments: 18
Kudos: 190





	Him who reflects the moon

**Author's Note:**

> hyuckil tag's dry af so I arrived
> 
> this is not beta-read and finished at *squints at the time* 2 in the morning. I worked hard, this is the final result. 
> 
> *throws breadcrumbs at fellow hyuckil lovers* eat well

Taeil’s life was pretty ordinary safe for the fact that he was a part of a motorbike gang. 

It was Taeyong’s plan from the beginning. He got his license, then he got a job at a local library and then he bought a motorbike - Ruby. And Taeil - like the fool he was - decided to roll with this and buy himself one too. And if Taeil and Taeyong had one, granted, Jaehyun and Doyoung also _had_ to have their own. It went downhill from there. 

He wasn’t even quite sure what they were doing as a “gang”. Undoubtedly Taeyong could be a little bit intimidating and perhaps backed up by Johnny, with his barely-there accent, and Lucas, they seemed pretty much invincible, but to Taeil’s knowledge, they had never done anything even remotely illegal or shady. 

Anyhow, Taeil was a part of one of the most famous motorbike gangs in the city, that happened to be running exactly three districts. Which was quite cool, he supposed.

It could also come handy in the most ridiculous of situations. Like when he really, _really_ , wanted to get a job at the CD store, all he had to say was his name and the owner offered him a job on the spot. Or when he ran out of money to pay at the petrol station, the cashier simply winked at him. Taeil still paid double the next time he was there.

Not to mention that boys and girls constantly _flocked_ to the whole gang. Everybody wanted to be, if not a part of NCT, at least acknowledged by them. The holy intercession of Lee Taeyong, Moon Taeil or Kim Doyoung could open literally any door. As long as this door was situated somewhere within the three districts that they controlled.

It’s been four years since Taeyong had bought his bike - he hadn’t changed it for a newer one, mind you - and currently, NCT had 20 members and counting. It was much bigger kind of a deal than Taeil had even expected to come out of Taeyong’s fooling. But, Taeil mused, Taeyong had grown up a lot since then. He became more mature, he mastered the it-is-time-to-get-serious look, he quit the job at the library and bought and renovated a diner, he background-checked everyone who showed interest in joining the gang… Years ago, Taeil wouldn’t have guessed that Taeyong had leadership running in his blood and yet here they were.

 _Here_ being the counter in Taeyong’s diner which also happened to be their unofficial headquarters. Taeil liked the vanilla shakes they served. They made up for having to sit at the long meetings. Taeil looked around. Johnny, Doyoung, Jaehyun and, Mark. Clearly, Taeyong was up to something. He didn’t call them without a reason. 

“There’s this kid,” Taeyong started, sliding behind the coffee machine. 

“Didn’t we establish that we’re not a free babysitting organization?” Doyoung rolled his eyes, resting his cheek on the top of the counter. “How many more members do we need? How many more kids do we need? Those who came recently are a handful anyway…” he mumbled the last sentence, glancing at Mark. 

“Jisung and Chenle joined last year, your argument is invalid.” Johnny snored. It wasn’t a secret that he loved taking care of the youngest members. In the beginning, Taeil had been concerned but soon enough he realized that Johnny simply liked being needed. And Jisung and Chenle almost always needed some sort of help. 

“But you’re not always around, Johnny,” argued Jaehyun.

“That was one time!” Johnny angrily stabbed the french fry with his fork and dipped it in the ketchup. Mark made a disgusted sound.

Taeil sighed. 

“Go on, Taeyong” Taeil waved at the leader. He had a shift at the store in two hours and he preferred not to be late. “Tell us what’s up with this kid.”

Taeyong sent him a grateful smile.

“His name is Donghyuck but he usually goes by Haechan and the thing is,” Taeyong pinched the bridge of his nose. “That he hasn’t actively tried to join NCT yet.”

Taeil hummed with interest, encouraging Taeyong to continue. 

“Let’s start with the fact that Haechan and I used to be neighbors, that’s how I know him. He’s one year younger than Mark,” Taeyong pointed at the said boy. “But I don’t think you would be able to tell his age right away. He had always been very intelligent. Very perceptive. He knew his way with everyone and everything.”

“So why haven’t you mentioned him earlier?” Doyoung asked, stealing one of Johnny’s fries.

“Haechan moved out of the town five or six years ago, shortly before I bought Ruby, and came back a few months ago.” Taeyong shrugged. “He was bunking at Jeju or something. Apparently, he was a part of a gang there too for a year or so. I’ve seen the stickers on his bike. They seem pretty legit. I asked around, talked with Namjoon and a couple of others and indeed they heard of someone named Haechan. So now that the kid is back… I think it would be wise to snatch him before anyone else does… We could make good use of someone like him…”

Taeil studied their leader for a moment, digesting his words. Not even once over the past 10 years had he doubted his friend’s judgment but it didn’t mean that Taeyong made no mistakes... Sure, a new member could be profitable in the future but… Taeil liked to believe that before anything their group had been friends, family. Not just a group of “useful people”.

He rubbed his temple, letting out a tired sigh. The thing about being the person who Taeyong trusted most came with great responsibility sometimes. Taeil looked at the leader, his eyes wide as saucers staring right at Taeil himself. He felt his shoulders drop. This kid must have been special if Taeyong cared that much.

“It’s better to have him with us.” Taeil declared, playing with the straw of his milkshake. “Besides, let’s be honest. At the beginning we never let them go stray across the city. Someone trustworthy will take care of that Haechan and check if he’s legit…” he explained calmly, sprinkling his milkshake with a bit of cinnamon. 

He didn’t have to raise his gaze to see Taeyong practically beaming at him. 

If it was anyone else, they would have to vote. But Taeyong backed up by Taeil had an authority that none of the others dared to step against. 

Doyoung’s fingers drummed against the counter and Mark discreetly slid off his chair. 

“It’s settled then,” exhaled Jaehyun. “Twenty members NCT no more, I suppose.”

“Are you aiming to hit two thousand before the year two zero zero zero, Taeyong?” snorted Doyoung and the leader smiled at him softly. Taeil never quite understood how their dynamics worked.

“I have no such plans, Doyoung. Dismissed.” Taeyong laughed, turning on the coffee machine and filling the room with the loud buzzing. 

Taeil watched the others leave the diner. He could tell where they were going without asking. Mark had Jaemin, Jeno and Renjun to check on. Johnny probably was on his way home, where he would nap until Chenle came banging on the front door. Doyoung and Jaehyun would pick up Lucas and Kun and set off for their daily drive around the districts… 

And Taeil? Taeil had a job to do. But before he had one more question.

“One last thing,” he said, leaning over the countertop so that Taeyong could hear him better. “Who is going to take care of the kid for the time being?” 

The leader’s eyebrow arched up and the corners of his lips quirked up coyly. 

_Oh, no._

“Well, since you were the one who offered, Taeil...” Taeyong batted his dark eyelashes. 

* * *

If there was one thing that Taeil had never grown tired of, it was the sound of the rumbling engine. It never failed to send shivers down his spine. Always filled his veins with a shot of serotonin. He loved everything: the overwhelming smell of hot oil, the sensation under his feet when he heard motorbike coming, the sight of machines on the horizon. Everything.

Taeil rested his elbows on Starry Night’s worn-out black seat. Just like Taeyong, he hadn’t changed his bike ever since he bought it. By now, he could totally afford a better vehicle, but he simply didn’t have it in himself to give Starry Night away. Every moon needs a star after all. 

He watched the motorbikes getting closer. Even from the distance, he could tell the name of each driver. Taeyong at the front. Johnny on his left side, then next to Johnny there was Mark, right after them Renjun and YangYang. Taeil crooked his head to the side, eyes traveling on Taeyong’s right side. Usually, it was Taeil’s spot. It was _still_ Taeil’s spot. But currently, it was occupied by a complete stranger motorbike. And even more strange driver. _Haechan_.

Before he could appraise them better, the gang had been stopping right next to him. Taeil deeply inhaled the smell of boiling oil, knowing that it would relax him at least a little bit. The last time he had a new member under his wings was years ago when - still bikeless - Jeno was allowed to join them after Mark’s recommendation. 

Taeil waved at Taeyong and the rest of the gang but he didn’t even pretend not to be at least a little bit curious of the new member who somehow managed to end up behind everyone. Taeyong beamed and wrapped a gloved hand around Taeil’s to pull him closer. 

“Taeil.” he motioned the crowd to make more space. “Taeil, this is Haechan. You’re his new mentor.”

At first sight, Taeil could see what Taeyong meant by this boy’s intelligence. It was sparkling in his eyes, under the thick layers of mirth and mischief, which meant that the next couple of weeks at least wouldn’t be a complete bore for Taeil. 

“Hi, I’m Donghyuck but you can call me Haechan.” Haechan grinned at Taeil, showing a row of white teeth. “And that’s my bike, Sun,” he added, pointing at the vehicle behind. 

Taeil smiled slightly. Back then it didn’t seem like a verdict. It sounded like a promise. Moon and Sun. Nothing could go wrong. Taeil thought that he liked that idea.

* * *

Days spent in Haechan’s company were like arrows. Taeil had never realized that time could fly that fast, like sand slipping through his fingers. Before he realized Haechan had been part of the gang for over a month. Everyone knew what that meant - if there were no complaints he would officially become a part of NCT. 

“You should get a sticker for your bike in no time, kid.” Taeil smiled at Donghyuck, sitting in front of him.

The boy grinned at him widely, partly showing Taeil the half-chewed hamburger inside his mouth. Taeil snorted and crossed his arms on the chest. If he was honest with himself, the moment Haechan gets a sticker, scared him a little bit. It would mean that he wouldn’t need a mentor (“babysitter” according to Donghyuck himself) and would no longer have a reason to hang out with Taeil. Surely, Haechan found the company of younger members more entertaining. And yes, Taeil thought that the age difference between them wasn’t that big, he liked to think that Haechan and he had a lot of topics to talk about but… it didn’t necessarily have to look the same in Donghyuck’s eyes.

“Don’t think so hard, hyung.” Haechan laughed. “You look like you’re about to fry your own brain.” 

Taeil gracefully kicked Haechan’s leg under the table, savoring in the grimace that crossed Donghyuck’s face. 1:0 for Overthinking Hyung. Even if he had to use violence to win this round.

“Seriously though, hyung.” whined Donghyuck, after swallowing the rest of the burger. “Scoot over.” he murmured, slipping from his side of the booth on Taeil’s side. “Tell me what’s on your mind. Maybe I could help you. You look like you’re dying.”

Taeil could feel the tips of his ears start to burn. Thank Taeyong for putting red blinders in the windows. Taeil could always blame them for the sudden change of color on his face. 

The strong smell of oil, petrol and whatever Haechan used to wash his hair tickled Taeil’s nose. Precautiously, he moved away, earning an unimpressed look.

“Nothing for you to worry about, kid.” Taeil tried again, putting a hand on Haechan’s shoulders and gently pushing him away. He had done it hundreds of times for the past month but this time, he found himself strangely empowered. As if Donghyuck’s black leather sucked in all of his strength. 

Haechan rolled his eyes. “Seriously, hyung? You pull the ‘don’t worry’ shit on me?” he huffed out, slapping Taeil’s hand away. “I thought that we were supposed to be friends.”

“We are,” Taeil argued weakly. He took a deep breath in, feeling his self-control melting against Haechan’s pout. He didn’t fight when the younger stole his straw and started sipping his milkshake. 

“It’s stupid anyway…” Taeil sighed finally. He had a suspicion that he wouldn’t leave this booth until he told Donghyuck. 

“Oh, oh. Stupid usually means emotions.” Haechan wiggled his eyebrows and passed the empty glass to Taeil. “Problems with girls, hyung?” 

Perhaps it was for the best that Taeil didn’t have anything left to drink because, surely, he would have choked on that. 

“You know that I don’t have a girlfriend.” Taeil wheezed, hoping that the hint of panic in his voice was undetectable. 

“Maybe that’s the problem.” Donghyuck shot back, smirking slightly. 

“As if you’re the one to speak.” Taeil snorted, waving at Yuta who had just walked into the diner. He really liked the hair color that Yuta went for. He always looked good in white. Maybe Taeil himself could change his color… Nothing as wild as Yuta, of course, but perhaps a warm blonde... Maybe…

Taeil rested his chin on the palm and, sighing, looked back at Donghyuck. He was a little bit thrown away by the fact that he could see the faintest traces of blush covering Haechan’s cheeks. 

_“It’s probably for the red blinders in the windows.”_ He thought, wondering what in fact could make Haechan blush. He was always so bold and self-assured. _“Perhaps kissing would make him blush. Blushing like a preschooler.”_ Taeil smiled at the mere thought. It would be adorable to see Donghyuck frustrated like that. 

Snapping the older out of his thoughts, not knowing that he was their subject, Haechan cleared his throat.

“You know, hyung, if there’s one thing that I’ve learned it’s that if someone cares, a girl or a boy, they would come back to you,” said Donghyuck softly, biting at the inside of his cheek. “Even if you think they left for good, they’ll come back.”

Taeil blinked surprised. He didn’t expect Haechan to continue the subject. Especially not in that kind of melancholic way. Taeil’s heart stuttered for a moment, realizing that there had to be a story behind those words. He’d love to ask, to help, to offer some kind of support. But he couldn’t. It wasn’t his place to ask. Not yet. Perhaps never. Instead, he mustered some courage and put a hand on Donghyuck’s shoulder.

“Thanks, kid.” Taeil smiled softly, watching Haechan’s eyes turn into liquid amber. It partly soothed his own anxiety. “And just remember that if ever needed, um, wanted some help or advice… I’m here.”

* * *

In the end, nothing changed once Haechan (though Taeil stopped using that nickname a while ago) gained a sticker - the ultimate sign of NCT membership - on his motorbike. The world didn’t come to an end. Taeil’s heart didn’t break. Nothing had changed except for the sticker on Haechan’s bike and a proud pin on his leather jacket. 

“Wouldn’t you rather hang out with people your age?” Taeil asked, hand running through his newly dyed hair. He quite liked the blonde. 

Donghyuck looked at him confused. Like that, sitting on his bike with the sunset behind his back, he looked pretty much like a Greek god.

“What do you mean, hyung? Don’t you think that I’m a delight to be around?” he asked in response, flashing his way too familiar grin. 

“You know damn well that it’s not what I mean, brat,” Taeil muttered under his breath, tearing his gaze away from the younger.

“Started at the ‘kid’, now we’re at ‘brat’. Woah, hyung your vocabulary is expanding!” Donghyuck laughed loudly, sliding off his vehicle. He probably thought that he was hilarious. 

“Well, you’re not exactly a kid anyway, right?” Taeil wiped the drops of sweat rolling down his temple. He loved driving around the city in the summer but the heat was unbearable sometimes. “Definitely not a child, at least.”

Donghyuck’s eyes widened slightly and he froze a few meters away from Taeil, looking at him with a mixture of awe and confusion. 

“I thought that you considered me a younger sibling or something?” he asked after a moment but the taunting note, usually present in his voice, was gone. 

“I have a younger sister. You’re nothing like her to me,” sighed Taeil, putting the cleaning cloth under the seat of his bike, and pushed himself off the ground. He felt like eating ice cream. “Besides, that’s enough younger siblings for me.”

Donghyuck’s eyes lightened up with thousands of sparks, red and crackling with mischief. “Well, maybe you could introduce me to her, hyung?” he sang sweetly. 

Taeil’s heart squeezed uncomfortably in his chest. 

“She’s too good for you, Hyuck. Besides,” he glanced at Donghyuck, taking in his oversized white t-shirt tucked into worn-out jeans, his leather bracelets wrapped around the wrists, the burnt tips of his hair. “I don’t think that she’s your type either.” 

Donghyuck let out a breathy squeak. 

* * *

The rain was drumming against the windows of Taeyong’s diner. Today the business was under Taeil’s watch as the leader, along with a few others, had to visit a couple of places in the districts nearby. As Taeyong always repeated - better safe than sorry. 

Usually, Taeil didn’t mind watching the diner, especially since on Wednesdays it was pretty much empty, but today… today for some reason he was a little bit over the edge. He angrily cleaned the counter, shooting an annoyed glare at the group sitting in the corner. Even from the distance, he could see the blonde tips of Donghyuck’s hair and the messy mops on the top of Chenle’s and Mark’s heads. Haechan’s laughter, under other circumstances nice and pleasant, now was too loud and joyful, drilling through Taeil’s skull. 

_Deep breath in, breath out._

“And then Jaehyun-hyung grabbed my hand and told me to get the fuck out of his room or he’ll call the police!” Mark concluded loudly.

Apparently it was a pretty strong punch-line because Donghyuck almost literally started rolling over the table. Not that Taeil watched. He would hear this story from Jaehyun anyway. On a later notice. Or maybe Donghyuck would bother to tell Taeil after the meeting of The Joyful Youth Club that Taeil apparently wasn’t a part of.

“I need a milkshake,” Taeil mumbled to himself, turning away from the counter. Milkshakes were the only damn good thing about this place right now. At least - for once - it wouldn’t be served with a cherry on the top. 

Completely engrossed with the preparation, with Pixies’ Velouria playing in the distance, Taeil missed the moment when the diner became more empty and quiet. Wednesdays were not busy days after all. Blissfully oblivious Taeil poured the milk and vanilla powder into the shaker and turned it on, securely putting the hand on the top of the machine. The last thing he needed was spilled milk everywhere.

Once the shake was ready, Taeil carefully poured the content into his tall glass.

“You haven’t made one for me? That’s just plain rude, hyung.”

A few drops of creamy milkshake spilled onto the preparation counter and Taeil’s heart made a tiny flip.

“Donghyuck,” he sighed, a small smile dancing in the corners on his lips. Taeil looked up at the younger who was peeking behind the large coffee machine. “Where are the others?”

“They left a couple of minutes ago. Things to do, business to attend.” Donghyuck waved a hand, showing just what he thought of their leaving. “But I’m here, doesn’t that count for something, Taeil-hyung?”

A pleasant shiver ran down Taeil’s spine. He liked the way Donghyuck said his name. On his lips, it sounded like a melting caramel. Something smooth and soft. He wished Donghyuck said it more often. 

“Well don’t just stand there,” Taeil sighed and gestured at him to come closer. 

Donghyuck grinned widely and quickly rushed on the other side of the counter. His sneakers squeaked quietly against the floor. 

“Wait,” Donghyuck suddenly stopped in tracks, “Is that some kind of a test? Are you sure I can be here?” he asked, raising his eyebrow suspiciously. 

Taeil looked at him with a dose of surprise and impression. When Taeyong was in the diner, younger members were usually prohibited from standing behind the counter, place reserved for older boys. It was a little bit admiring that Donghyuck respected Taeil enough to ask about the issue.

“I won’t tell, Taeyong if that’s what you’re asking, Hyuck,” Taeil murmured, redirecting his attention back on the milkshake. “It’s not like he would get _that_ mad either,” he added swirling the straw.

_It’s not like Taeil would be able to refuse anything to Donghyuck if he asked nicely._

The radio in the corner started playing one of the Pixies’ older songs that Taeil had already known by heart. The lyrics rolled down his tongue almost immediately. He would rather focus on something well-known and familiar than the boy next to him. The maddening scent of petrol and mint shampoo messing with his head. 

“I didn’t know you can sing, hyung,” Donghyuck said suddenly.

Taeil shrugged, trying to brush the comment off, and rested his hipbone against the counter. He refused to acknowledge Donghyuck’s eyes traveling down his bodyline, following the motion. It was probably only Taeil’s imagination anyway. (The spark in Taeil’s guts, however, was everything but imaginative).

“I sing sometimes. Everybody can sing. I just happen to be good at it.” he explained, taking the milkshake of the counter.

“You’re not just pretty good, hyung. You’re fantastic!” Donghyuck quickly shook his head. “You’re voice is amazing! You could probably make a career out of it! Become second Bon Jovi or something…”

The last comment riped a burst of laughter out of Taeil’s throat. 

“Seriously? I dare you to imagine me with that kind of hair. Be my guest,” he briefly spread his arms, still chuckling. 

What Taeil didn’t expect was Donghyuck to eye him once again. This time with _intention_ burning in his eyes. Taeil gulped and quickly crossed his arms on the chest, muscles on his back tensing a little bit.

“I bet you’d still pull that look, hyung,” said Donghyuck, eyes casting down.

Taeil coughed awkwardly, trying not to suffocate under the barely-there, almost undetectable compliment. 

_“Hyuck’s young and adventurous. Of course, he’d end up saying something like that sooner or later.”_ he reasoned silently, _“Johnny probably deals with that sort of comments all the time.”_

Pixies finished playing yet another song and suddenly room filled with the first accords of Born To Be My Baby. Taeil found himself smiling. Bon Jovi. Who would have expected? Donghyuck, in front of him, snorted and took a step back.

“Seems like I summoned the prince himself.” Donghyuck smiled smugly.

“Oh, god. Please don’t bring Prince into the mix.”

Taeil promised to never mention how long after the closing hours he stayed with Donghyuck in the diner that evening. Once again the time was slipping through their fingers. It was hard to follow the sun behind the windows when the diner was brightened by Donghyuck’s personal light. So warm and inviting that Taeil couldn’t bring himself to leave. On the other hand, it was _easy_ , _too easy_ perhaps, to turn up the music, to start awkwardly dancing around the diner, to yell the lyrics of the songs at each other. It’s _fun and easy_ and, on the contrary to society’s opinion, Taeil rarely did _fun and easy_. 

When they slid down the counter to sit on the floor it was almost midnight but none of them cared enough to point that out. With a relaxed smile painted across his face, Taeil stretched out to grab lost forgotten milkshake. He carefully sniffed it before taking a sip. It was lukewarm, awfully sweet and terribly melted. Taeil decided that he loved it.

“You’re a vanilla type of guy, huh hyung?” Donghyuck asked, pointing at the liquid inside the glass. There was a certain lilt in his voice that Taeil couldn’t place yet. “Vanilla voice, vanilla-colored hair, vanilla milkshakes… vanilla sex probably…” 

Blood rushed to fill Taeil’s cheeks with color. The tips of his ears were positively burning. 

“Oi!” he squeaked, weakly pushing Donghyuck away.

“Oi what? I’m right, aren’t I?” Donghyuck crackled diabolically. Despite Taeil’s attempts to put some distance between them, he seemed to be even closer than before. “Or are you willing to prove me wrong, Taeil?”

“Taeil- _hyung_ ,” Taeil replied hoarsely, determined on maintaining the eye-contact. “And you can always ask Taeyong about that,” he added quickly, his voice barely above a hush. 

Something dark flashed through Donghyuck’s amber-like eyes. Not disgust that Taeil feared, something else. Something darker. Donghyuck clicked his tongue. 

“Sure thing, _hyung_. Excuse my bad manners.”

Taeil scrunched his nose at the obvious irony behind these words. He could call Donghyuck out. He really could and probably should but it was late and they had spent the past couple of hours giggling and dancing and singing and Taeil couldn’t care less. 

“Whatever,” he sighed finally, letting his eyelids slip. For now, he found it easier to talk to Donghyuck with his eyes closed and insecurities kept in the darkness. 

It wasn’t as if Taeil paid attention but it occurred to him that Donghyuck was breathing a little bit faster, harsher, more shallow. Or maybe he never paid attention to that earlier. _“Maybe you should start paying attention,”_ provided his brain. 

“So…” Donghyuck cleared his throat, trying hard to keep his tone uninterested. “Taeyong-hyung and you…” he trailed off and even with his eyes closed Taeil could almost see Donghyuck’s fumbling. 

It took him a moment for the question to sink in.

Oh.

_Oh._

Taeil bit his lower lip and opened one of his eyes to look at Donghyuck. His cheeks were covered with an aggressive blush.

“No, not at all.” Taeil said easily because that was the truth, “We were fooling around years ago but that’s all.”

“Fooling around?” Donghyuck repeated slowly. Eyes fixed on his bitten nails. 

“Just two kids experimenting with each other in high school,” Taeil explained patiently, internally shrinking under Donghyuck’s odd behavior. He doubted it had anything to do with sexual orientation, and if it wasn’t that then… Oh. _Oh, shit._ He snapped the other eyes opened and turned to properly look and Donghyuck. “Do you want to talk about safe sex? God, Hyuck. I’m so sorry, I should think of that earlier, gods. In my defense, I can say that I didn’t know that-”

He stopped abruptly as he watched Donghyuck’s shoulders jump up as he snickered silently. Bewildered, Taeil for a couple of seconds watched him laugh wordlessly. Sun-kissed cheeks were still peppered with red blush but at least the frown on Donghyuck’s face melted away. Taeil considered it a personal victory.

“Rude.” Taeil huffed out, sinking lower onto the floor, trying to hide his own embarrassment “I was concerned for a moment here.” 

“And I wholeheartedly appreciate that, hyung.” wheezed Donghyuck, patting Taeil’s knee and leaving a hot handprint on his clothed skin. “That was kinda cute. But a little bit too late, you know. But then… I suppose that what happens on Jeju, stays on Jeju…” he hummed thoughtfully. 

Taeil decided to let the sentence hang without a commentary. It was a bait and he couldn’t take it. He wouldn’t. 

For a while, they sat in complete silence as the radio stopped playing a long time ago without either of them noticing. Taeil was about to get up and suggest going home when all of a sudden Donghyuck’s small voice surprised him yet again.

“But there’s nothing between you and Taeyong-hyung nowadays, right?”

Taeil tilted his head back, fighting against the urge to search for the motives hidden in Donghyuck’s eyes. Maybe he wasn’t ready to find it yet.

“No.” An easy answer, an honest one too. “There’s nothing between us now. We’re just friends.”

Taeil also refused to believe that the tiny smile he saw on Donghyuck’s face when they were finally leaving the diner had anything to do with Taeil’s answer.

* * *

It was a warm autumn day and there were no signs of the upcoming revolution on the horizon. In fact, Taeil mused, that it was one of the most boring days of his life. He didn’t know why he decided to spend his free day in the middle of the forest, sitting on an old picnic table. Maybe he simply missed some peace and quiet. 

The wind rustled in the branches above his head. He had always liked autumn best. The chilly air in the morning and warm sun rays on the skin around the midday. The eerie afternoons and spiked with adrenaline nights. Taeil hardly considered himself an adventurous person, but if he was to do something reckless - it had to happen in autumn.

His ears fished out the sound of the engine an hour or two later. At first, Taeil brushed it off, there was no way someone found him here unless they were looking. The clearing, he was resting at, was situated nearby one of the rarely attended roads in the forest surrounding the city. He carefully picked the spot among others to avoid meeting with an unwelcome company. 

However, the noise of the engine was growing louder and louder, until - finally - Taeil could pick up the characteristic rattling and huffing of the tired machine. He knew the vehicle that made these noises almost as well as he knew his Starry Night. 

_Sun._

And her intoxicating driver. 

Taeil kicked the stone laying under his foot. For the past couple of weeks, he had been avoiding Donghyuck. The strange - mostly inappropriate - thoughts that hunted him in the middle of the night were happening more often than they should. Especially since most of them included Donghyuck. Donghyuck breathing harshly through his nose, Donghyuck tugging off his leather gloves and smirking at Taeil, Donghyuck’s golden skin quivering under Taeil’s fingertips. _Inappropriate._

Nonetheless, he was sure that Donghyuck must have had picked up that Taeil was avoiding him. After all, they were almost inseparable ever since Taeyong introduced them to each other a little over a year ago. 

Sun let out a loud thudding sound - a signal that it parked somewhere nearby. Taeil rubbed the bridge of his nose. If he played it right, they could go back to what they used to be. If he played it right, he could hope that one day his blossoming feelings for Donghyuck would disappear without a trace.

Donghyuck stepped into the clearing, letting the scent of petrol tickle Taeil’s senses. It was a very small clearing. And Taeil happened to be very sensitive to petrol’s smell. 

“I’ve been looking for you, hyung,” announced Donghyuck, sitting next to Taeil on the picnic table. He was close enough for Taeil to feel the warmth of Donghyuck’s hand next to his own. Pity he couldn’t grab it. 

“Well, you found me,” Taeil replied smoothly, busying himself with watching the squirrel jumping on the tree in front of them. 

“It wasn’t easy.” Donghyuck scrunched his nose. “I had to ask Taeyong-hyung and he was at the diner with Jaehyun-hyung and Doyoung-hyung and, of course, they were fighting slash bickering and I had to step in and…” Donghyuck shuddered. 

Taeil nodded absently. He knew just exactly how unpleasant it can be to cross paths with that trio fighting. Blood had been spilled, bruises had been earned. He could tell Donghyuck that story but wouldn’t that push them closer? Would it be wise to push them closer?

“Why did you look for me?” Taeil asked instead, almost instantly regretting the question.

Donghyuck scooted closer, his leather jacket brushing over Taeil’s.

“I’ve been missing my favorite hyung.” he whined quietly.

On any other day, Taeil would have poked fun on his but today his heart was soft and full of questions. 

“I missed you too, Donghyuck.” he admitted earnestly, startling a surprised gasp from Donghyuck. Taeil crooked his head and shoot him a brilliant smile, “What? You thought that I didn’t?”

Donghyuck bit the inner side of his cheek, unwillingly showing off the dark-pink shade of his cheeks. It was fascinating that despite the whole bravado, at the end of the day he was incredibly easy to frustrate. It took a while for Taeil to discover that.

“It’s hard to tell if you miss me when you act as if you were enjoying getting rid of me…” Donghyuck mumbled finally, a tad shyly and a tad accusingly. 

Taeil frowned. “It’s not like that.”

Donghyuck raised his gaze, liquid amber in his eyes burning brightly in the autumn sun and under the heat of emotions.

“Then tell me how it is, hyung. Because I can’t tell.” he snapped angrily, “You admit that I’m not a kid anymore, you give me hope, you spend time with me - so much time - and you seem to genuinely enjoy that, you suggest that you’re not completely opposed… r-romantic activities with a person of the same gender and then. Suddenly. Without a warning. You leave.” his voice wavered, dripping like molten glass. “It’s not exactly fair. And it makes absolutely zero sense!”

“Donghyuck…” 

“Let me finish!” Donghyuck’s voice spiked, pressing into Taeil’s thick membrane of self-defense like a sharp knife. “Just… Tell me, hyung. Tell me where is it going. Is it going anywhere at all? Because I will accept anything. You’re too precious for me to lose you. I promise that I’ll hold no grudges if that’s what you’re worried about…” his shoulders dropped slightly and his hand moved away from Taeil’s. 

They weren’t holding hands to begin with and yet it felt like Donghyuck had just slipped away from Taeil’s grip. It hurt.

Taeil remained silent. Thousands of scenarios running through his head. Dozens of reasons on what could go wrong flashing in front of his eyes. Finally, millions of ways to apologize but none of them making it out of his throat. 

Cold fingers gently brushed off the single strand of blonde hair falling on Taeil’s forehead. Donghycuk was smiling, smiling at Taeil, but this time - for the first time - there was something broken in the quirk of his lips, something shattered that tinted them pinker than ever. 

“I get it, hyung. You don’t have to say anything.” Donghyuck didn’t even sound heart-broken, as if he suspected the answer, or better - a lack of it, from the beginning.

He jumped off the table and stretched his arms in the air. And this one time, just this one time, Taeil allowed his eyes to slip down from Donghyuck’s face. He took in the irregular heaving of his chest, the odd quivering of his legs, the way his knees appeared to be made out of cotton. 

And, for Taeil, it was visceral really to rush closer, step into the personal step and wrap his arms around the miracle that Lee Donghyuck was. Him, the child of the sun, most likely, finding peace in the sweet embrace of the moonlight. 

Donghyuck sighed into Taeil’s crook of the neck, hot air tickling the skin. Muttering something akin to ‘thank you’. Their heartbeats finding a similar rhythm, thoughts and lists threw out of the window. 

“Thanks, hyung,” Donghyucks repeated, this time more firmly. “You can let go now, I will leave you alone just like you wanted,” he added, trying to wiggle out of Taeil’s grip. 

“No.” the word went first, the implications seconds later. Seconds too late to take it back. Not that Taeil would.

“What?”

“No. You’re not going anywhere.”

A sad chuckle, a little bit devastating and a little bit wounding. 

“I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to talk about it now, hyung.”

“We don’t have to talk.” throat like sandpaper because maybe, there was a chance, that all of that had been a massive joke. Taeil had never been very perceiving. He wasn’t Donghyuck.

The breath against his neck quickened, slashing open every inch od Taeil’s skin.

“Then what do you suggest?” Donghyuck hummed but it lacked usual cheerfulness. It still lacked its usual lilt. 

“Can I kiss you?” Taeil felt his heart dropping before he even finished the sentence. He had ways out, until now when he burnt the bridges and shot a hole in the boat, hoping that the water beneath his feet wasn’t as deep and dark as he feared. 

Donghyuck inhaled sharply and, since they were so close, Taeil could hear every hiss of the air in his lungs.

“If it’s a _fucking_ joke, hyung-”

“It’s not.”

All of sudden, instead of the scenery, Taeil was looking at the warm liquid amber in Donghyuck’s eyes, now staring at him with hope and adoration. And a threat. Tiny threat. That hot amber could burn.

Taeil was the one who closed the distance between them because he was older and the one who asked. He was the one who closed the distance but Donghyuck was prepared. Perhaps he had been thinking of that as much as Taeil did.

Their lips pressed gently against each other, innocently, just to taste the water, to check if they are really here if that’s not a dream. That kind of dream that would leave them longing and aching again. Taeil smiled slightly, wrapping his arm tighter around Donghyuck’s waist, pressing a little bit harder. Without a real intend still, but certainly with hope for it. He heard Donghyuck suck in a breath. His breath was full of Taeil. The kiss broke, leaving them millimeters apart. 

“Are you sure, hyung?” Donghyuck whispered quietly, eyes closed and eyebrows drawn together. 

Taeil moved his hand from Donghyuck’s waist to his cheek, letting it rest in the warmth of his palm. The crinkle in the middle of Donghyuck’s forehead disappeared. 

And suddenly Taeil had much more to say. He wanted to ask if Donghyuck didn’t mind the age gap. He wanted to make sure that he wouldn’t be bothered with the critique that they would have to deal with sooner or later. That Donghyuck could handle their friends’ jokes and friendly nags. 

And then Taeil realized that none of it really mattered. All that matter was for him to answer Donghyuck’s question.

“I am sure if you are.” 

This time it was Donghyuck who locked their lips together so, naturally, it was deprived of the shyness and hesitance that Taeil expressed. Donghyuck’s kiss tasted like burnt caramel and something sweet and undefinable. But addictive. Certainly addictive. Taeil bit at Donghyuck’s lower lip, earning a soft whine that flared something down his core. He bit again - sharper this time and it was like tapping the right key because suddenly Donghyuck’s mouth was opened for him. Hot and inviting. Taeil’s tongue gently slipped over the lower lip - repeatedly running over the spot that he bit earlier - before prodding the inner corner of Donghyuck’s lips and unfreezing the younger.

And suddenly the kiss was more of saliva and tongue and much more teeth than Taeil expected but he didn’t complain. Even if he didn’t expect this day to escalate this way. Because Donghyuck felt right. Right under Taeil’s fingertips, warm and inviting and soft but with a pinch of spice. Like vanilla with cinnamon. 

Taeil’s hand slipped from Donghyuck’s waist and settled on the small of his back, under the thick leather. He could feel Donghyuck shiver just from the most simple press of fingers there, the goosebumps distinguishable even through the shirt. Taeil melted into the kiss, feeling how welcoming and responsive Donghyuck was. How much he wanted Taeil just like Taeil wanted him. If it was possible he would wear the imprint of Donghyuck’s hand of on his neck every single day for the rest of his life and-

Donghyuck snorted and Taeil pulled away confused.

“What?”

Donghyuck opened his eyes. With his lips reddened and blood rushing under his skin, he looked _blissful_. 

“Nothing. You were just grinning into the kiss and I don’t think you’ve realized that, hyung.” 

He hadn’t realized.

“I haven’t.”

Donghyuck’s nails dug harder into Taeil’s black leather, marking it with tiny crescents. Funny how to Taeil they would remind more of a sun imprints.

* * *

The diner was always busy on Saturday evenings. People buzzing around, chatting, exchanging jokes and rumors. Taeil was sure that Donghyuck and himself were a source of at least half of those. He didn’t mind. Both of them were members of NCT. and NCT have always had each others’ backs.

Taeil’s hand dropped on Donghyuck’s knee and squeezed it lightly. They had been dating for almost three months now and these had been the best months of Taeil’s life. It was like a new light was poured into his dailiness. He couldn’t believe that he used to live in such darkness. 

Jisung harshly put the trays on the table, pulling Taeil out of his thoughts. 

“These new rules suck,” he growled in Jaehyun’s direction.

Doyoung batted his eyelashes, patting Jisung’s hand. “I thought you, young members, wanted to stand behind the counter from time to time.”

“Yes but not when…” Chenle trailed off, glancing at Taeyong dancing with trays across the diner. “Not necessarily on Saturday evening.” he finished pushing a vanilla milkshake in Taeil’s direction.

“Don’t worry. Next time you’ll be sitting with us while Donghyuck’s going to sweat over the perfect double beef burger.” snickered Taeil, pulling the milkshake closer.

“Ha, ha, ha. Very funny, Taeil-hyung,” mocked Donghyuck, swiftly catching the cherry from the top of Taeil’s milkshake and putting it into his own mouth. 

His eyes darted to his boyfriend’s and he puckered his lips, showing off the glistering fruit trapped between his teeth, before firmly sinking them in the cherry. Taeil gulped watching Donghyuck’s lips color with the deep red juice.

_“It was the exact same shade that covered Donghyuck’s face when Taeil left the first hickey on his neck. He remembered the blush spreading down, lower than the cut of the grey shirt showed but Taeil promised himself that he wouldn’t see that part of Hyuck’s body until both of them would be ready. Imagination from the other hand-”_

“Taeil stop thinking about whatever you are thinking because you make it hard for me to finish my fries.” Johnny moaned with disgust.

“If it stops you from dipping your fries in that tomato monstrosity, then perhaps we should thank Taeil-hyung’s dirty mind for the favor,” Mark argued, stealing the clean fry from Johnny’s plate. 

Taeil aggressively coughed on his milkshake.

“I’ve never like cherries so Hyuck here-”

“Ew, please, no visuals!” Jungwoo grimaced, manically crossing and uncrossing his arms. “I haven’t seen anything and I don’t want to see it in my head. Seeing Jaehyun’s pushing his tongue down Doyoung throat draw the final line.”

“Dude, it’s been months ago and it was one time!” Doyoung screeched loudly. 

“Hate sex!” Johnny poped out unabashed, pouring more ketchup on his plate and - unwilling - dragging the conversation away from Taeil and Donghyuck. 

Taeil felt Donghyuck shift closer to him, hand resting on his shoulder with nothing but his flannel shirt on the way.

“ _Taeil_ -hyung’s dirty imagination, huh?” he asked in a hushed tone.

“Their words, not mine.” Taeil hummed in response, his thumb drawing circles on Donghyuck’s knee. 

Donghyuck’s chest vibrated against Taeil’s arm with silent laughter. Taeil shuddered, shuffling back and letting Donghyuck’s chin rest on his shoulder.

“Maybe, let me be a judge of that…?” Donghycuks trailed off, his lips grazing over the shell of Taeil’s ear. 

The thumb on Donghyuck’s knee halted for a moment, before picking up the pattern. The break was long enough for Dongchyuks to notice but short enough to send a message.

“Not now…” mumbled Taeil, digging nail into the soft flesh a little bit above the knee.

“Later?”

“If you are sure, you can handle it…” Taeil smirked pushing the milkshake in Donghyuck’s direction and pulling away. 

Donghyuck hummed and raised the glass to his lips, putting the straw between his teeth.

“I’m pretty sure I will manage.”

Taeyong’s tray landed on the floor with a loud clatter.

“What have I told you about flirting at the family table!”

**Author's Note:**

> Since, hyuckil tag has like 4 readers in total, every kudos is very precious to me.
> 
> talk to me about hyuckil world domination on my [twitter](https://twitter.com/sunbathed_)


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